The Tempest

Not Exactly Shooting For \”Miss Congeniality\”

Dis-Organized Religion

Posted by Daniel on Thursday, February 2, 2006

Ever feel like you were stuck in a bad scene of a movie? Or stuck in a scene of a bad movie? Lately, I keep hearing those jaunty words from the Exorcist…”The power of Christ compels you! The power of Christ compels you!” Considering those who would, and have gotten all preachy with me lately, it’s really enough to make me toss my lunch.

The latest attempt to have an anti-gay marriage ammendment added to a state constitution – this time in Florida – was defeated due to proponents of the ammendment coming up way short on the required signatures. Eventhough they were aided by use of privet jets to shuttle the petition around the state. God must have been busy that day, you know, smiting all the fags in Massachusetts at a local gay bar.

Now, here’s a great big shocker…I’m not at all religious. I do not believe in practicing something that, in esscence, teaches people to love thy neighbor, except those who don’t look, sound, act or love according to that particular faith. As if the different faiths have any answers. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not against people of faith. If faith is what gets you through the day, more power to you, so to speak. I count myself more as a spiritual person. I’m a tree-hugging, animal-loving (and not in a way that makes me want to marry my gerbil, Pat Robertson!!) , middle-of-the-road card-carrying liberal. But I’m not stupid. I can tell the difference between people of faith, and blind faith. The only thing the faiths have in common is their hatred and biggotry. Other than that, they can’t agree on a damned thing and would just as soon wipe one another off the face of the Earth as look at each other. “But first, let’s take care of those sodomites.”What is the deal with these people?? They supposedly take their Bible word for word. Is that where they learned that slavery is okie dokie? Where their wives are merely property to be treated however they please? Where it’s okay to stone an adulterer to death? Wait, actually I’m kinda for that one. There’s nothing I’d like to see more than Rush Limbaugh stoned…and not on Oxycontin!!

Just once, I’d like to not be the cause of the whole worlds’ fucking problems. For once, I’d like not to be ready to pounce on every straight asshole carrying a bible or not. (Apparently, gays are out to jump every nervous man out there…hmmm, news to me. By the way guys, DON’T FLATTER YOURSELVES!!). Could I try and go a day without trying to suck the life and holiness out of every married couple in the world?! Jeez, I never realized what a depraved little shit I really was until I had the pleasure of some bible-thumping biddy and her whipped husband spit on me in the WalMart parking lot today, who then proceeded to call me a sodomite. Of course, I thanked them (or did I spank them?) and told them they’re number one with me, and using a finger to underline that compliment. I know, “sticks and stones”. And I agree. Maybe if that couple would pull those sticks out of their asses, they’d stop throwing stones. Here’s a little quote from the motion picture Jeffrey, “Oh look. There goes a nice wholesome gay couple!” Instead, we get to be the political, moral and religious punching bags for every kook and crumudgeon out there.

Sorry for the rant. Can yo tell my parking lot experience with the God patrol really struck a nerve? It’s not as though I was just swishing through the parking lot on my way into WalMart (Gods’ hangout, by the way) or anything like that. I usually tend to save that kind of act for when I’m at Target.Bless you all,


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