The Tempest

Not Exactly Shooting For \”Miss Congeniality\”

Into Perspective

Posted by Daniel on Thursday, May 4, 2006

Here's a question I'm sure you've asked yourself before:

"Why the fuck am I killing myself over this…?"

Okay, maybe you aren't the type who uses such colorful language (killing is an awful word, isn't it?), but a variant of that question has, at one time or another, crossed your mind I'm sure.

Here's my point…(tell me if you can relate)…

This week, my uncle went into the hospital. I get an update from my mom that he's undergoing tests to determine the causes of his condition, while my aunt is being calmed by my mom and her family. Okay, I'm waiting nervously for another update – like test results – and I get an email (again, from mom) telling me about the funeral plans. What the…??? How did we go from "in the hospital" one day to "funeral" the very next day?!

I think that's pretty much the way life – and death – are. They just happen. You really don't get too many chances to soak in the details of what is currently happening around you – or to you for that matter – before they are simply not happening anymore.

It's so damned easy to be caught up in the details of our lives. You turn around from your monitor or local bartender and suddenly something in your life has changed. Dramatically.

For example, this week has been a particularly busy one for Steve and I…

I have to:

  • Work
  • Run the Homeowners Association
  • Manage a neighborhood clean-up
  • Manage and maintain not one, not two but three web pages
  • Take care of the landscaping around our house

PC Overload
Steve has to:

  • Work
  • Run this household
  • Help me manage the neighborhood clean-up
  • Listen to me bitching about running not one, not two but three web pages
  • Listen to me babbling about all the pretty landscaping
  • Do the shopping
  • Avoid the daily temptation of throttling me
  • Do the cleaning (99% of it)
  • Put up with my demented "isms"
  • Pay dearly for his "Princess Time"

Steve makes lemonade out of Daniels lemons...

All of this we cram into each and every day. We try not to let it pull us into a rut, but we're adults and the occasional rut is inevitable. It's so easy to lose sight of the bigger picture. We can bitch and complain about how shitty our day has been and one of the many good things about being married (yes…that's what we call it…deal with it!) is that you have an understanding person with whom you can vent. Then you have to , as Steve puts it, "Think outside the box." Okay, so today sucked. "I'm sorry you had a shitty day, Babe. Come here…". Hugs ensue.

I guess what I'm really trying to say is that I can sit and bitch about how hectic my life can be (AND IT REALLY IS), but then I think of my aunt and uncle.

My life is full of love and laughter. My aunt has just lost that.

I have the most caring man in my life. My aunt lost hers.

We can look at the future and say, "What else?" So many others are saying, "What now?"

Honestly, I don't know the real reason I wrote this. Maybe I just wanted to say how much I'll miss my funny uncle; how I wish I could be there to give my aunt a reassuring hug and how thinking about them both really puts things into perspective for me.

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One Response to “Into Perspective”

  1. I just wanted to let you know how moved I felt reading what you wrote.

    I don’t know why you wrote that piece either, but I’m glad you shared it. After having a crazy and very difficult day – pretty much as you described – reading that has really put pushed things back into perspective to start the weekend with the person I love. Thank you.

    My condolences for the loss of your uncle.

    Nik

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