The Tempest

Not Exactly Shooting For \”Miss Congeniality\”

Dick Gives Me Gas

Posted by Daniel on Friday, July 14, 2006

Just the other day, Jeoff and I were talking about the price of gas at the pump. He has a bigger concern in that he commutes to work from a suburb in Kansas, about 34 miles each way. I have it much easier, as I live and work in the same town, and it’s litterally only seven minutes from my driveway to my work parking lot.

Jeoff is your typical married-with-children kind of guy. The last thing people like him (especially) need is to be paying so much for gas. And he is not shy about stating his anger with his gas bill for both his work vehicle and his wife’s minivan.

Up until about a month or so ago, he was quick to blame his fuel woes on the “A-rabs who cayn’t git a grip!”

Okay, Jeoff is about as hillbilly as you can possibly ‘git‘ without shitting banjo’s.

He has a hypothesis that, I have to admit, I at first thought was more in the ‘conspiracy theory’ realm. Now, however, I’m starting to believe in the power and intelligence of folks who live in Hooterville.

His theory goes as follows:

Back on April 17, 2001, Cheney and former Enron CEO Kenneth Lay arranged a meeting with the Energy Commission. The details of this meeting and it’s participants are, to this day, being kept under wraps as a matter of national security. It is believed that the heads of most of the largest oil companies, refineries, Halliburton and others were the major attendees.

At this meeting – according to Jeoff – Cheney came up with a Win-Win plan for both getting Bushs’ energy agenda to fly through congress, at the same time netting record profits for the oil guys. This really starts to make some sense.

Bush and Cheney want nothing more than to drill in ANWR (the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge), as well as in more of the federally protected areas of the Gulf and off the East and West coasts.

The oil companies who are already drilling in federally owned (meaning you and I own that land) areas in the Gulf of Mexico are banking every cent of profits. Problem is, they are supposed to pay a percentage of those profits back to the government (you and I) as payment for the right to drill there. Not one of those oil companies currently drilling in the Gulf have paid one red cent back to the people who own that land. One more time…you and I.

The Whitehouse wants more drilling done on more Federal land done by the same big oil companies and will allow them to continue raping the owners of that land.

That secret energy meeting back in 2001 mapped all of this out. And here is how they get the Bush Energy plan through Congress:

  1. Keep a war going in the Middle East that continues to destablize the entire oil producing region. This hikes up the cost of each barrel.
  2. Produce less oil domestically which leads to less oil refining.
  3. Continue to allow prices at the pump to climb while oil companies net record profits.
  4. Have everyone around you, as well as the talking heads and media pundits tout the need for drilling in what is now restricted federal land.
  5. The angrier people get over the cost of gas at the pump, the more they contact their representatives.
  6. Bring us face to face with our addiction to oil, while hyping the need for more alternative fuel and hybrid cars. At the same time, keep the cost of producing alternative fuels and hybrids sky high. Thus continuing to be our ‘pusher’ and supplying us with what we really need…our daily ‘fix’ of gas. Which is costing too much.

As I said, Jeoff seems to have all of this mapped out in his head, and I’ve tried (with his permission) to put it all down in this post pretty close to how he divulged it to me. I decided to post this because he does make a valid point, even though you really have to follow the zig-zag of his message.

Thanks, Jeoff, for all of this. Maybe someday all of this will come to light and Dick will have to, at long last, answer for this. No matter how well those criminals in the Whitehouse (and Congress for that matter) cover their asses now, all truth comes into the light eventually.

But in the meantime, you sassy hillbilly, why don’t you use some of that moonshine in your vehicle? I’ll bet you can get across town faster than goose shit through a tin horn!

(He actually said that to me once!!)

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One Response to “Dick Gives Me Gas”

  1. JollyRoger said

    Shooter can’t tell the truth, can’t drive a car, can’t shoot straight, and sure as hell can’t manage a war.

    Is there anything Shooter can do that doesn’t end in a bloody cluster?

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