The Tempest

Not Exactly Shooting For \”Miss Congeniality\”


Posted by Daniel on Monday, August 7, 2006

There’s something very icky about Monday.

For one thing, I just can’t seem to get my collective shit together mentally. I know, everyone has that very same feeling. Well, do you wake up feeling like you’re only 3 years old? It’s no fun, let me tell you! Especially when you wake to find your footie-pajamas are all bunched up in all the wrong places!!

Nevertheless, I bound out of bed, because there is much to do before Sweetie wakes up…

Coffee has to be made.

Kitty’s need to be fed.

Email must be screened, read and answered.

I need to get cleaned and dolled up for the day.

All my favorite blogs, websites and online newspapers have to be read.

It’s a vicious cycle. Sometimes I feel like I’ve been kidnapped from my life as a club baby and thrown into the daily drudge of mowing the lawn and saying things like, “Howdy Neighbor.”

I know what you’re thinking, “What’s he bitching about? He’s got a nice home, a good life and the best spouse you could find?” Hey, I agree completely. It’s not like I’m going through some gawd-awful mid-life crisis. Jeeze, I surely don’t want to be one of those idiots!

Sidebar: Usually when I see those guys who look to be my age or older and their fat ass is stuffed into a sports car, I’ll yell out, “Sorry about your penis!!

Actually, I’m very happy with my life and wouldn’t change a thing about it. Except for still not winning that Powerball thing. That’s still a work in progress.

I guess what I’m trying to say is I really hate Mondays.

It’s the day my brain just doesn’t want to play nice.

Aaaannnnnyyyyywwaay, tune in tomorrow. I’ll try to have my shit together then.



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