The Tempest

Not Exactly Shooting For \”Miss Congeniality\”

Showtime At The Apocalypse

Posted by Daniel on Friday, September 29, 2006

The image “” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.I love filling out and sending party invitations. Other than the fact that Steve and I love to throw parties (minus the clean-up…blick!), it also gives me something to look forward to socially.

Don’t get me wrong, we’re very social…but parties are pretty much the only way we can get our “townie” friends to haul their asses this far out to the suburbs.

This one is for Halloween – my favorite holiday – and if you were a fly on the wall, you’d see that there is always a flurry of activity beginning October 1.

Decorations have to be set up. We’re not talking about some lights and pumpkins. Kids’ stuff. No, we tend to collect certain items for this party pretty much throughout the year.

At this point, I must admit to you that we have some neighbors who are of the uber-Christian variety, who are convinced we are going to hell. I know this because they’ve actually told me so. “We’re afraid you’re both going to go to hell if you both don’t accept Jesus as your personal savior and repent your ‘gay lifestyles’ and pagan worship.” Yes, they actually said that.

(fuck! you dress up as Judas Iscariot once for Halloween and they shit a brick!!)

“For the record,” I responded, “and with respect, ours is not a lifestyle ‘choice’. It’s a small part of our lives. As for pagan worship [Steve is Wiccan…I’m just a wiyatch], my spouse and I simply believe in being good people…but we’re not practicing.”

Honestly, you accidentally splash a few drops of goats’ blood on their lawn and they have a sacred cow.

(just kidding…we don’t do that kind of shit) (it was chicken blood)

At this point I have to admit that no matter how in-your-face these neighbors tend to get about their religion – and they do…at great length…whether you want them to or not – I respect their right to believe in what they want to. It does, however, tend to be somewhat annoying that they don’t allow Steve and I the same respect.

Don’t get me wrong, they aren’t always preachy towards us. Most of the time they just avoid us. If they are in their back yard doing their gardening (or as I call it “Planting the seeds of Armageddon”), and they see me coming to work in our yard (the yards are seperated by a chain link fence), they usually just scamper back inside, stand in the door and scowl. brings me back to Halloween.

This will be our “Pumpkin Slasher V” party which is for pumpking carving and obviously costumes. Much fanfare goes into this as there are always fabulous prizes for best costumes and pumpkins. Naturally, pumpkin carving must be done outside (because some folks bring power tools for the job), so the new and improved deck (see here, here, here, here and here) is perfectly set up for just that.

Well, we certainly can’t have a Halloween event going on the deck without a bit of decoration. Okay…a lot of decoration. Which bleeds out into the back yard.

I love parties. Does anyone know where I can get some life-size Four Hoesemen?


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